So
this is me Erika Cole. I was born on the 25th day of February in
Brooklyn, New York. I like the color pink and soft green. I love the
smell of flowers (tulips and peonies), my favorite flavor is whipped
cream, and I enjoy spending time alone in a world full of people. Odd
you may think but it's the truth. I also enjoy fishing, reading,
shopping, personal development, and spirituality. I have been told that I
have a great sense of humor, but I personally think my humor is what
keeps me sane. I have worked at an aerospace company for the last 10
years, and before that I spent time in the United States Navy. I have 2
beautiful children - my oldest is a gorgeous girl and my baby boy is a
bundle of imagination. I am a divorced single mother living in
California and surviving thanks to the help of my mother. I try to live
each day to it's fullest but there are some days when I come down with
the case of the blues.
I am a hopeless romantic and a
free spirit. Structure makes me feel caged in and suppresses my inner
Goddess. I want a lot out of life. I want a healthy family, financial
comfort, marriage to a supportive/loving man, but most of all I want to
live. I struggled for a brief time with alcoholism, but that was short
lived. It took me no time at all to realize that my problems were still
there when I was sober. I needed to get better for the sake of my
children and for myself. I took time out in my life during my 20's to
get myself an education. It was a struggle but I stand before you a
woman with an Master's degree in business. I enjoy it but I don't think it's that big of a deal. I
just knew that in order to be better I had to do better.
Early
in life I experienced some things that a child is not suppose to
experience. I was molested at a very young age. My first memories of
things not being quite right I was about four years of age. This
continued on until I was about 17 years old. There was not just one
person in particular, but a conglomerate of whom I felt robbed me of my
childhood. I found myself wanting to leave home and never return. I had
run away on several occasions only to find myself back home wishing I
could escape reality. That is when I decided the Navy would be my best
bet.
So there I was 18 years old, on my own and
feeling lost but free. Free from the stress, free from the chaos, and
free from the abuse. My only regret in leaving is that I had left my
siblings behind to virtually fend for themselves which still bothers me
today. I needed to find a way to heal and move on. To make a long story
short my marriage was short lived but I am still grateful for the
experience. It taught my what I like and did not like. It taught me how
to stand up for what I believe in, and not to settle for anything less
than being treated like a Queen.
I
have a had a few attempts at relationships of which none of them stood
out, but here recently I have found myself in love with a person that I
don't get too see as much as I would like, but for some unknown reason I
am kind of okay with that. He has taught me that love is so much more
that what I initially thought. I have experienced a different type of
love from this man. A weird, tingly, I'm giddy all over type of love.
Something I thought I would never experience, and let me tell you it
feels phenomenal.
I still face daily challenges like any normal person. I
mean who would I be today if I were exempt from the speed bumps that
life threw in my lane. I just want people to know that life doesn't give
you more than you can handle, and sometimes awful things happen but
they happen for a reason. Where would I be know if I didn't go through
the abuse, the tough divorce, and having to restructure my life? I love
myself, my children, my family, my man and most of all I am loving
life.
I hereby declare that I have forgiven all that have
shamed me and/or done me wrong in the past. I believe you did not know
that what you were doing was wrong in the eyes of so many. What kind of
person would I be if I held anger in resentment in my heart toward you.
You no longer have that type of power over my thoughts.
"Never regret anything
you have been through, because only with those trials will you become a
better person the next day." ~ Crystal Hunt
